When Christian was first born he was a month early and spent 15 days in the NICU for his lungs being under developed. He was intubated and a little machine helped his baby lungs breathe for about 4-5 days.
The situation was awful and I didn't even get to hold him for about 2 days! He got stronger and better with each passing day, but I feel the 15 days without his Mommy right by him made him not want to be close to me in the next few months to come.
He was always fussy with me and did not let me or want me to hold him, cuddle, or even kiss him. He always cried and it made me cry in return. I felt he hated me. I felt nothing but rejection from him and how could I? He was only a baby. Just a few months old.......
Well, as the months passed I still MADE him lay with me and cuddle. I was NOT going to let those 15 days distance us forever! NO WAY!
I nursed him for almost 4 years! Yes, you heard it right 4 years!! hehe And people tried to tell me every chance they could that I was crazy and I should stop.
No way! How again could I take that away from him? He loved it, as I did every chance I got....I laid with him, with the quiet all around us, looked into his eyes, cuddled more, and I loved every minute of it.
To this day he is a big Mama's boy and is soooooo affectionate to ME! Not really anyone else, and especially not Daddy.
So my point of this little story:
The other night I was laying him down for bed and I told him the story when he was a little baby he didn't like to give me kisses or cuddle. I was very sad.....He looked at me with his big brown eyes and gave me a simple answer that made my night!
"Well, it's because I was a baby and I didn't know you. Now I do, and I love you sooo much!"
My Sweet Boy, that is all I needed to hear! :)
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